My Dad asked me when I was little what I wanted to be when I grew up. My response? Happy.
Simple, right? Perhaps … but I’ve traveled a long and winding road to get back to this place – to the beginning.
One day I woke up and simply didn’t recognize my life. I had veered off course through a series of small actions…going left in lieu of right, staying put instead of setting off, saying yes when no was the better answer. Here I was and yet – I wasn’t. Not the Capital “H” kind of Here at least.
By society’s standards my life looked great – a lovely, rent controlled apartment in San Francisco with parking (akin to having a unicorn), challenging work as a Director at an innovative Fortune 500 company, no debt, and a great community of friends. And yet I didn’t recognize myself. My Pinterest boards were full of greenery, cabins in the mountains, campfires and puppy dogs and I was living on a bus line.
So what does one do when you wake up and don’t recognize yourself in the life you’ve built? I started examining everything and asking the hard questions. Well, for me it actually started with an easy question posed by Danielle La Porte in the Desire Map: “How did I want to feel?” That question changed everything.
My path was not a straight one. I bartended my way through college (one of many early life coach incarnations) then on the urging of a friend moved to NYC after graduation. I had no plans and the prospect of a 6-floor walk up in Greenwich Village sounded charming. The neighborhood? Absolutely! Walking up 6 flights carrying heavy things on the daily? Not so much. I simply took a leap of faith and landed in one of the favorite chapters of my life. I spent the next 5 years working in production with MTV/VH1, traveling the country like I was in a circus with some remarkable humans, wrangling talent and managing dressing rooms anywhere from the RuPaul show to the VMA's and all manner of small, sometimes bizarre productions in-between. It was an exciting and happy time.
When I decided to move on to California, also without a plan, things were different. I got out of my heart and into my head. I started looking around at what other people my age were doing. Examining all the should's and their choices. I probably should do ______. Don't responsible people do ______? I began questioning myself and ignoring that little voice inside. What did it know? In hindsight I can tell you it knew a lot. That began the decade of my living a good on carbon paper life instead of a blueprint of my own design.
Now don't get me wrong. My life was perfectly fine. It just didn't really feel like mine. When I discovered The Coaches Training Institute for life coaching and leadership training it was like coming home. I found not only my work but answered my calling. A calling is that strong urge toward a particular way of life or career; a vocation. The pull towards a path that you forge yourself when not following the should breadcrumbs into the woods. When we discover our yearnings it is like plugging into source.
Now years later my coaching practice allows me to work with bright, creative, capable, interesting clients who also want to live more fully, feeling plugged in. They desire alignment and resonance in their life and want to do the work to stretch themselves into their maybe someday imaginings by consciously creating their lives. If this sounds like you or something you want to experience let's talk.
Want to see if we are fit? I offer complimentary, confidential chemistry sessions where we can explore what is possible for you from here.
CERTIFICATIONS Coaches Training Institute, CPCC & Leadership Program Graduate 2014-2105
UNDER THE HOOD