Photo by Jordan Steranka on Unsplash
To be self-centered is generally considered to be a negative thing and with synonyms like egotistical and self-absorbed it's no wonder. But what might it mean to center yourself in your life? Does being self-centered have to mean selfish?
“Definition of self-centered
1 : independent of outside force or influence : self-sufficient
2 : concerned solely with one’s own desires, needs, or interests
— self-centeredly adverb
— self-centeredness noun”
As a recovering people pleaser I would like to challenge that notion and offer that placing yourself at the center of your life doesn't have to mean that you are solely concerned with yourself. It can also mean you are aware of yourself and choosing to put your oxygen mask on first. It is about having a sense of agency. Being Self centered allows you to get clear on what matters most to you so you can align with your values. It allows you to recognize and hear your voice clearly over the din of the collective which allows you to make conscious choices.
Centering yourself in your life is similar to the mast of the sailboat. It is placed at the center of the boat for a reason. If it was put it at the front or side it would be unbalanced and easily capsized.
Being centered allows you to keep your sights on the horizon while still being a good host to the others onboard, riding the high seas of life with you.
Center yourSELF first so you are better able to experience your life fully while also showing up and supporting others.